The Fantasy Killing Switch-A-Roo

From the desk of W. J. Onufer

I’ve had people ask me if a character in my Tales of the Vampire Hadley Price books is based on them. Usually it’s someone who erroneously thinks they’re super-cool and worthy of having that much influence. I’m all about discretion so I don’t tell them that, no, that character isn’t based on knowing you. The creation of my characters are based on interesting people I’ve met or have heard about. That person asking me that wasn’t interesting. He was just loud. And in that loudness he was cliche, down right boring to me. Not at-all interesting.

And yes, my typing fingers have killed off characters who had personality traits of people who’ve wronged me. It’s true. If you’ve ever screwed over an author, a character who is like you, will meet their demise. To which I say- thank you very much. The times I could not avoid interacting with people like that provided me with examples of how truly awful people can be. They’ve helped me manifest evil in a way I couldn’t have without them. And there is a decidedly wicked pleasure is taking down truly awful people inspired characters.

And those egotistical super-cool wanna bes? I thank them also. Their cliche is funny as hell. The total cluelessness on how laughably un-original they are is hoot!

Kill people in the pages of my books if they’ve done me wrong? Absolutely. But more fun than that is fabricating situations and characters that mock people I’m acquainted with who are no-talent posers who act like they’re it on a stick and the arbiter of what is and isn’t cool. Those people are hilarious. Damn Funny. Is it any wonder that humor is a big part of my Tales of the Vampire Hadley Price books? And again I say- thank you very much.

But in this kind of thing, more times than not, I tend toward finding a way for a character to survive their deadly situation if that character’s creation is based- at least in part -on people who I’m quite fond of and have been nice to me. People who are interesting. People with intelligence and style and grit. People with proven strength. It’s kind of a switch-a-roo on the author fantasy killing of people they don’t like.

It’d be interested to find out how many other writers also tend to favor a positive outcome for interesting, nice-to-me people based characters over spending time pseudo-killing truly awful people based characters.

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Watch “The Polka King” on Netflix, then read this

From the desk of W. J. Onufer…

I would hope by now that there is no doubt about my Sci-fi/Fantasy/Horror street cred. And while I look like a big, schluppy, middle-aged, white guy, I do, in fact, write the Tales of the Vampire Hadley Price books. I’m an author who writes about Vampires and have several fictional books out on the topic. Hadley Price is my ideal woman. She’s one kick-ass, super-cool, Vampire lady. And I’m the lucky dude who gets to write about her.

Inspite of my middle-aged, white guy, schluppiness, there is something in the way of a nerdy cool-factor in that. Sci-fi/Horror/Fantasy street cred well in place.

Please keep that mind as I relate my experience with something that totally lacks a cool-factor. This thing could be said to be the very manifestation of that which is uncool.

I’m talking here about Polka music. Yes, Polka music.

What, exactly, is my connection to this? And why am I saying something about it?

Currently on Netflix, there’s a new biographical movie called, “The Polka King”. It stars Jack Black as the real-life Jan Lewan. He was a Polish born American immigrant who came here (the USA), started a Polka band and, within that world, became quite famous. He was also a guy who ripped-off people to the tune of five million dollars in a Ponzey scheme to finance that rise to popularity. It’s all there in the movie.

No, I’ve never met Jan Lewan. But allow me to give you a little insight to what happens behind the scenes in the world of Polka music. As the movie portrays, it’s not all happy-slappy dorky music and jolly, seemingly mindless smiling faces. It may be Polka music, but it’s also has it’s darker side of the entertainment business.

My association with Polka music started in 1980 when I got my first radio job at a local AM station. As the new guy, I worked weekends, running the mixing board and cueing vinyl records for two live Polka music programs. They each would come in and sit behind the mic at the talent table. They did the talking and I did everything else.

One of those guys was easy to work with. The other wasn’t. They have both since passed away. And I won’t identify who either one was. Here in New England both were well-known, high-profile figures in the promotion of Polka Music that went back to the 1940s. One of them was a Polka musician. In his elder years he became a regional media celebrity- primarily in radio -who was all about Polka music.

It was then, with that guy, in his elder years, who I had shouting matches with when the microphone was turned off. On the air he was everyone’s kindly grandfather. One time, we had some listeners show up at the station. They were on-air contest winners and were invited in for his live show. With those people, in house, that elder guy played the cute old man. And they ate it up.

But that cute old man was a tyrant when it was just him and me in the studio and no one else. Granted, I was a cocky kid just out of college who would have much preferred being a disc jocky at a power house FM rock station. It took this gig as my first radio job in the hopes that I would move on at some point to another station and into the FM DJ chair. (The short version? Best paid plans. It didn’t happen.) And he was a Polka curmudgeon, at the end of his life, with decades of experience in the Polka music promotion behind him. He and I were not a great mix. Even with that- and with the perspective of hind sight -I was always professional in the studio. I never did anything that warranted his childish rants at me. He used to yell and bang on the table. He even threw things at me. Getting beaned in the forehead with a pencil or a wad of paper was something they didn’t cover when I went to the Connecticut School of Broadcasting. The guy was awful. Yes, behind the scenes, everyone’s kindly grandfather was a big Polka jerk.

A few years later, I was employed at another AM station. (Sadly, I never made it to FM). There too, I ran the mixing board for two different (not with the same guys as the other station) weekend Polka music programs. It was now the 1990s and the same time period dramatized in that Netflix movie, “The Polka King”. The two I was associaed with on those two different Polka programs at that station were great to work with. Could it be that I was a few years older and a little more mature than my experience with that first station? Possibly. (Likely.) At this station, it was Polka music but it was fun doing radio with those guys.

It was there and then that I saw the barrage of paper promotional materials promoting Jan Lewan litter the table in the talent booth of the guys I worked with at that station. And every single one of those promotional materials were tacky as hell. Low-class, no-class. Get a complimentary copy of his new album for air-play and also receive mega information about his mail order business. It was quite obvious to me at the time that Jan Lewan was holding up and exploiting the Polish pride banner as he tried to sell crass, really cheap, and over-priced Polish-themed garbage trinkets. I also couldn’t help thinking at the time that this guy was a Jimmy Sturr wanna-be. But he had no where near the class, professionalism and good reputation of Jimmy Sturr. Everyone knew that the real “Polka King” is Jimmy Sturr, not Jan Lewan

So now, years later, it’s 2018. I work at still another AM station that doesn’t have any Polka music programming at all. I haven’t heard any Polka music nor even thought about for a very long time. And I see this movie on Netflix. “The Polka King”. And it stars Jack Black. Surely it would be a comedy. I had just enough experience with Polka music to know that there’s a lot of material for parody. But no. It wasn’t a parody. It was about a name I haven’t heard in quite some time. Jan Lewan. The tacky trinkets guys. And this is a film about his life. Scam people for millions of dollars and they make a movie about you- to the tune of a Polka beat.

I will name two people specifically in my association with Polka music. One of the Polka music hosts on that second radio station I mentioned was a guy named Louis Dusseault. His stage name was “Happy Louie” and he was Polka Grammy nominee. He was a major band leader in the Polka world here in New England. I’ve also briefly met Jimmy Sturr on two different occasions. (Multi Grammy Winner) While Polka music has it’s darker side as any part of the entertainment business does, there are legit players out there. Working with Louie and meeting Jimmy Sturr were great experiences. Both were truly nice guys in person.

Of course, my experience with Polka music is years behind me now. I’ve exchanged by Polka nerdiness for Vampire nerdiness. Sci-fi/Fantasy/Horror ‘R’ us in several novels. I exchanged music for books. Truth be told, once I got past the perceived un-coolness of Polka Music, I do have to say that it was a few years of fun being in radio at that time.

It’s sort of the message of Polka Music. Yes, we’re not cool. But we have fun doing it.

Hmm…I’m thinking about contacting Jimmy Sturr to see if he’ll do a Vampire Polka. Or better yet, the Hadley Price Waltz.

Get your copy of Tales of the Vampire Hadley Price books here-

https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=dp_byline_sr_pop_book_1?ie=UTF8&text=W.+J.+Onufer&search-alias=books&field-author=W.+J.+Onufer&sort=relevancerank

 

 

New Tales of the Vampire Hadley Price for 2018

blog tfe2 teaser5From the desk of W. J. Onufer…

2018! It’s a New Year! Time to update your Tales of the Vampire Hadley book collection and read a quickie plot description of the up come new book, The Family Eternal: Part Two.

Book#1 Beckman’s Folly (available as an paper book or ebook)
Zombies show up. Yes, icky zombies. They have a way of limiting the Human fresh blood supply. Hadley’s not crazy about that. She leads a Vampire army to deal with them, with tragic results to someone closest to her.

Book# 2 The Family Eternal: Part One (Available as an ebook)
Every new relationship is clumsy, funny and frightening. But only more so when the Human man, Nathan Hughes and the Vampire Hadley Price meet and fall in love. Every great love story has a beginning. This is theirs.

Book# 3 Torch (Available as an paper book or ebook)
Hadley Price, the formidable Vampire known as the Guardian Angel, was used to inconveniences by Humans who got in her way. But when Hadley’s daughter, the young Vampire, Svetlana, is put in danger, Hadley and Nathan discover a threat to Vampires that spans across the Seven Worlds. No one messes with the family of the Guardian Angel.

COMING IN 2018
Book# 4 The Family Eternal: Part Two (will be available as an ebook)
The epic, centuries-long, monogamous romance between the Vampire Hadley Price and the Vampire Nathan Hughes was missing only one thing. A daughter. And Svetlana became that daughter. Teenage girls can be annoying and challenging to raise. Imagine if that teenage daughter is an attractive blonde who is also an undiciplined, newly-Made Vampire. Can even the Guardian Angel and her handsome Vampire lover, Nathan, be up to such a challenge?

If you’re missing any of the first three books, you can get them here-

https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=dp_byline_sr_pop_book_1?ie=UTF8&text=W.+J.+Onufer&search-alias=books&field-author=W.+J.+Onufer&sort=relevancerank

The fourth book, The Family Eternal: Part Two, is coming soon. Check back with us on the latest news on that here or at Tales of the Vampire Hadley Price on Facebook.